Life’s ups and downs [Hard times]
I’ve hit another trough in the road that is life. It’s lasted less than a week and, by this point, I’ve got the hang of riding out the cycle. The main causes of such cycles are things that make me stay up way too late one night (caffeine, sugar and/or vijjagames mostly) and, with nothing to do to keep me awake in the following days, my sleeping pastern shifts into the ever so comfortable 12pm to 8pm time slot.
Recently I have begun to suspect that the reduced amount of light due to this cycle is in some way causing me to feel bad about myself and so the spiral continues downward.
When I think about things though, they really aren’t so bad, at least not compared to this time last year. I’ve gone from being frustrated, depressed and just about to drop out of college to (having dropped out of college) having a small business of some description and I feel, somehow, more contented.
Today was my Dad’s birthday. It’s been so long since we were on speaking terms that I just kept out of the way. I just don’t know what to do any more. It feels as though there is nothing I can do but it won’t make the problem go away and it still makes me feel as though, no matter what I try to achieve, I will always have failed in his eyes.. It can be hard to learn to let go of a problem but I can’t let it eat away at me forever.
